Greece

If you can only take 1 vacation in your entire life, you need to go to Greece. I'd heard wonderful things about it, but I didn't expect it to be so amazing. Maybe because Cairo is so nasty. We flew into Athens and took a ferry to Santorini. Santorini is famous for its sunsets which did not disappoint. The people were fabulous. Food was fantastic. Could not have asked for a better way to spend a week away from Cairo.

Skype

I have it. It works. Kim called me on my computer and I thought that I needed a headset, but no. I have speakerphone or something on here. Awesomeness. So call me or at least add me as a contact if you have skype too.

For the slow....Skype is an internet program that you can download for free and talk to anyone anywhere for free.

The Pyramds

The past 2 weekends we have gone to play on the pyramids. It's been really hot, but still fun. Security is at a minimum so you are free to do whatever you please out there. The first weekend we (Owen, Angela, Norris, and I) went to Giza to see the Sphynx and the more famous pyramids. Then last weekend we (John, Emily, Owen, and I) hired a private driver to drive us around to Sakara and Dashur to see the step pyramid and the bent pyramid. We also were able to climb down inside to the tombs. John, of course, had to throw a little fit about going inside because it's so dark and scary. Owen spent most of the day on top of the pyramid throwing rocks at the security guards. We didn't get kidnapped so I'd say the day was a success.



P.S. It's alot easier to post pics on facebook so check there for the latest pics.

Canadians: Mysterious creatures of the North

Likes:
*documentaries
*Talking about documentaries
*mocking American politics (an obvious blow below the belt)
*documentaries mocking American politics and capitalism
*naming Southern cuisine and promptly asking if we seriously eat something called"Chicken Fried Steak"
*making jokes about Americans’ lack of knowledge of Canadian History
*Southern accents
*American sports

Dislikes:
*Bush administration
*organized religion
*capitalism
*Being compared to eskimos and polar bears

Taxi Cab Rules: Or how to Walk like an Egyptian

Crossing the Street:
First you must enter the street area. Be on your guard at all times. You can and will be hit by taxis. Or you will witness a wreck. Or both. Look to your right and to your left. Cars will be coming from both directions even if this is a one-way street. Also, cars might be speeding on the sidewalk to watch for that too. Try to find any Egyptians. Watch how they cross the street. They will glide through 60 mile/hour traffic like Jesus walking on water. But you cannot cross yet. You must wait for the right time. When the Spirit moves you, cross each lane one at a time. Remember that there are no "real" lanes and cars can be in the left lane and instantly be in the right lane or maybe on the sidewalk or maybe making donuts on the pavement at any given time. I repeat you can and will be hit by taxis.

Getting a cab:
Wave the driver down. Approach the cab and announce your destination. They will approve or disapprove. For example, for me to get home I would say a large area near my house "Sabaa Emirat" (translated: 7 streets). He would then shake his head no and I would try several more taxis. Finally, one will agree. You enter the cab. A man needs to sit up front. If you have no man, then you put the ugliest, fattest girl in your group. Once you are in the cab, you will immediately notice there is no meter. The driver will be rocking out to some Arabic rap, maybe have a few strobe lights, no AC, and will be smoking with the windows rolled up. This is all perfectly normal. You only need minimal amounts of Arabic to dictate your way.
Shamel: left
Yamin: right
Henne: here
Iowa: yes
Shukran: thank you
You must give your driver what you think is the right amount. This might be 5L.E to 20L.E. You guess is as good as mine. If you short-change him then you better sprint out of the area quickly as he will chase you with his Arabic curse words. Do not despair. You will probably never see him again.

Cairo

Ok, So I'm in Cairo. There's so much to say about Cairo. I really feel that pictures will be the best form of communcating what happens. I'll try to take more pictures. Everything is really different. Even ordering a meal is a huge ordeal. Right now I'm at a little cafe (about 5 minutes from my apartment) stuffing my face and using the internet. This is pretty standard behavior. We have a great place and LOVE our neighborhood. There are 2 Canadian guys who work with us and live 1 floor below us. We are the only people in our building so it's very private. Ok, this blog is really lame. No more lame ducks after this. Just trying to get you guys the facts.

What were they thinking???

Project Bathroom

My furniture and basically everything I own in this life is still in a truck on its way to Virginia Beach. Yes, it's been over 3 weeks. Long long story. Whenever I get stressed out, it's good for me to have a project. So re-doing one of the bathrooms was my weekend project.

Before: (Yes, those are fish. Pink, blue and green fish.)

During:

I caught Jackie sleeping on the job. She was fired immediately.
The finale.

So what do you think? I'm not sure about the towels. I don't know if I should do all brown? Oh, bathmats are dark brown. (not shown)

people are stupid.

bad habit that I MUST break

I didn't realize that I did this until Reba brought this to my attention. Whenever someone does something to make me mad (this includes cutting me off while driving or sending me a bill in the mail or writing something in a blog that I disagree with) I have a small form of Tourette's, in that I immediately call him or her a "dirty whore" very loudly. I know this needs to stop but it just comes out so naturally. I usually don't think these people are dirty whores, with exception of the lady who stole my parking spot at Farm Fresh. Well, she might not be. Ok, so I really am working on this.

you are NOT ready for this jelly

When Reba and I were last together, we decided to compare our bodies. Obviously, there is a HUGE difference, but I wanted to know the facts. How much bigger am I than her? So we measured the most overtly diverse areas on our bodies. Biceps and butts. Get ready for these results. You might want to sit down for this.

My bicep is 4 inches bigger than hers!

My butt......7 inches bigger!!!

It's official. I'm on a new diet. This new "try not to eat everything in the house" diet is really hard to stick to. No doubt my new schedule has something to do with this. I'm basically living alone with Jackie (the family dog).

6am wake up to loud noise...this varies. sometimes it's someone putting in new hardwood floors or my mom talking very loudly with the head phones on

6- 10am eat and watch Tivo with Jackie.

10-11 move furniture (new hardwood floors...one room at a time)

11-2 eat more. facebook and tivo.

2-6 pass out from sugar coma

6 take jackie on a walk. sometimes run.

mom comes home around 7 or 8 after Aquacise (this will be discussed later) and dad rides his bike home from work around 9 (will also be discussed more)

then we eat. maybe watch a movie. stay up late.

This is will all change once my furniture gets here....hopefully sometime before I leave for Egypt.

Hangin' in da 'ham

Last week I received an email with this attachment:

Birmingham Itinerary
July 26-29

Friday
Arrive in the ‘ham
Eat dinner at 601 Wildforest Dr.
Piano recital

Saturday
Breakfast
-Original Pancake House
-Cracker Barrel
Take Mom to airport
Birmingham Botanical Gardens
Lunch at Cobb Lane
Harry Potter Day at Birmingham Zoo
Run on Lakeshore
Rent movie

Sunday
Church at Brook Hills
Brunch at Whole Foods
Kung Fu Panda
Olive Garden



So this is what we did this weekend. Except we didn't go to Cobb Lane due to an excessive amount of wine and chocolate cake. And we didn't go see Kung Fu Panda. :( The piano recital consisted of Reba playing a few selections from Pride and Prejudice and demanding our applause after each one. Harry Potter day at the zoo was cancelled due to rain. But we did enjoy a free day at the petting zoo due to lack of personnel at the front ticket booth. We had an addition of a trip to see Volcan. How can you resist a half naked statue of a Greek god? Obviously, we were very mature about it.

(Yes, that is Volcan's naked butt)

Feliz Navigon!

"No, I haven't talked to her about it yet. Yes, I know that we don't have much time. Look, I'll talk to her about it when we stop for dinner. Yes, I know how important this is. Yes, I agree that this is important. I will tell her ok? Don't worry."

This is the conversation that I hear from my mom when my dad called as we are driving to B'ham. Whaaat? Who died? What is going on??? We remain in silence in the car. I can tell that mom doesn't want to talk about it. So we stop at Subway. Silence. This is bizarre. Especially for my mom. And I'm totally freaked out. But then I realize something. My mom avoids ALL conversations unless they are about puppies and rainbows. So I wasn't too worried. We walk back to the car and she mumbles that she has to get something from the trunk. She was taking awhile to get whatever she needed. I walk back to the trunk and I see it.....a GPS system!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I HATE THESE THINGS!!!! They are SOO obnoxious. I refuse to use it. We fight. She hooks it up and we go down the road and Navigon is obnoxious. She can't pronouce her words correctly. We could not figure out "right at the roundabout" because it sounded like "rightahwoebtoincboo". I like to refer her to as Navi. Navi is a hater. When you speed she screams "caution! caution!". Horribleness. She doesn't answer any of your questions. Like, "Navi, where are we?" I have to have her all day on Monday when I drive to VA Beach. But I found out how to mute Navi.

Feliz Navigon!

99 boxes of beer on the truck...

99 boxes. That's what the movers counted. I have too much stuff. It's official. Most of the boxes were from the liquor store (because those boxes are free). Turns out the head mover guy (not sure on his title) is from Israel and his wife's family lives in Egypt and her 2 kids go to my school! Small world!!

Disclaimer

I just checked my checking account. Some of you with upcoming bdays (Reba, Kim, Sudan-belated), you might be receiving some lightly used articles of clothing or maybe a very rarely used vacuum cleaner.

No, Burka, no!

Today I was shopping at Bed Bath and Beyond minding my own business, when I turned the corner and was scared out of my wits. There was a lady in a burka walking with her sons. It was like seeing Darth Vader for the first time. I couldn't move, couldn't scream, couldn't breath. After a moment of feeling paralzyed, I ran in the opposite direction. This was very traumatic for me. What am I going to do when I see them all the time in Egypt??? These things are seriously scary.

Oh, and Emily mentioned that she saw one at Sephora. Makeup?? What for?? Please explain!

Also, do little babies wear burkas? If so, that might be kinda cute.

Hair.Is.CUT.OFF

I'll put a pic up later. I'm at Panera Bread so I don't want to scare the families around me by taking a picture of myself. What am I doing at Panera Bread? If you are asking this question you have not had their breakfast sandwiches and mocha. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

Car is fixed. Hair is short. I like it. alot. I have 30 pages left in my journal and 30 days until I leave for Egypt. Weird. I have had this journal since May 2006. It's a large journal, but I guess I don't journal that much. Blogging has taken over my journal time. Except for the secret stuff and that goes in the locked Hello Kitty journal. Don't hate.

Famous last words

After working out at the gym and making a list of all the things I have to do today, I thought "Geez Louise, all I wanna do is stay in bed and watch movies. I really don't feel like driving all over town." So I go out to the car to begin the plethora of errands. And my car won't start. God, are you trying to be ironic? Called the Roadside Assistance and they tried to jump start my car. No luck. Now I'm waiting on the tow truck to drag my car to the dealer. Of course, the dealer said that they can't get to my car until Monday. No loaner car. Haters.

I guess I got what I wanted. I'm watching Chicago and packing the kitchen. Not going to be running any errands for the next few days.

For Sale

good things

Emily has graciously agreed to administer my B12 shots to me. Yes, they are butt shots. Awesome. At times like this, I'm so glad that she is part Lebanese. And I'm really glad that she is not sick at all of the Lebanese joke.

Suzanne was in a boating accident today. Sliced her head open. 7 stitches. But not eaten by sharks. So this is good news. I'm sure she's enjoying her pain pills right now. Seriously, I'm very glad you are ok, SuzieQ.

I enjoyed a day at the museum (It was kinda weird not having kids or not being an Asian wearing a track suit on vacation.) And lunch at Cafe Brasil. Me gusta!!


I made so many phone calls that my phone died twice. But I did absolutely no packing. Good times.