Friday, March 14, 2008

Who rocked the body who rocked the party?


Went to a new class on Wednesday. It was better than Pilates. I was the newbie and everyone stared at me. The instructor was this butch construction worker chick from the 80s with a huuuuuge gap in her front teeth. So obviously, I loved her. But my favorite part was when she walked around the room and would point and yell "AWESOME!!" and "SUPER!!" and "PEEEERRRRFECT!" at me. Yes, me. All the pointing was to me. Yeah, I rocked that Sculpt class. Ok, so I was the only one under 60 and not preggers.

It's not about the stoplight.

After spending 28 minutes at a stoplight (which was NOT broken), I have decided I don't like Houston. Yes, it took me 4 years and 3 months to determine this. I think it's time to move on. For several reasons that I will not publicly write about. But I just wanted to let you know. Just in case you get sad when I move away. You can't say that I haven't warned you that I'm going to quit Houston.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Engaged!!

No, not me. Don't worry, I have been reminded 3 times this week (yes, it's only Tuesday) "And that, Melissa, is why you will never get married." So I have a big mouth and I'm cynical. Whatever.

My friend Kelly got engaged and I love the story!! So here it is:

"He took me to Vic and Anthony's for Valentine's Day and when the waiter brought over the dessert menu it was actually a menu he had made that was an exact replica of the actual dessert menu and the last selection said "Kelly will you marry me" and I read it about five times before I looked up and said "is this for real?" and then he dropped to one knee in the front of everyone in the restaurant and asked me to marry him."

LOVE IT!!!

Knowing me, I would have ruined it and ordered something else. "Um yes, I'll have the creme brulee"

R.I.P. Reba's blog

Sadly, Rebes has become paranoid that one of her colleagues might discover the true identity of her blog so she has terminated the link. However, she has assigned me the task of renaming her site so that no one will ever associate her with it.

Please vote for your favorite:

"Asian babies and placentas are hot"
"Hottie with a body"
"I can't find my purple upside down glasses"
"Me gusta big muscles"
"I drive a Toyota"
"I'm too sexy for my car"
"I miss my lisp"
"Don't hate just because you can't relate"
"Single and ready to mingle"
"Terminally awkward"
"Liquid lunch"
"I fell off a stripper pole in the party bus and tore my ACL"
"You're just another vagina" (this is what she told me today after i told her about the trip to the gyno)
"Don't worry...I'm a doctor."

Unfortunately, these suggestions were too obviously descriptive of Reba and so obviously Reba, so she wishes that you suggest more.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Voting....not my idea of fun

Mom: So are you excited about voting tomorrow?

me: What? i don't vote. (just to get her all mad....hehe)

mom: You don't vote???! Why!? Since when? Have you EVER voted?? What's wrong with you? I need you to go vote for my man!!

me: Mom, Huckabee is not going to win.

mom: He might!! (proceeds to discuss politics for about 15 minutes or so as I download music from Itunes and put the phone down)

me: Well, it doesn't really matter to me. i'm probably going to leave the country soon anyways.

mom: But you'll come back one day....right? And just think, when you come back...Huckabee might be the prez!!!

me: Mom, just because you met him and you think you're best friends now doesn't mean he's going to invite you to the white house or anything....

mom: He might....

me: Ok, well that's a good reason for me not to vote for him. You do not need to be anywhere near the white house.

mom: (goes on for about 20 minutes about how Huckabee will win just like Ronald Reagan)

me: ????

hmm......

Man gets shot to avoid work

Please note the reason why he was avoiding work.

Monday, March 03, 2008

I can't decide....

I'm really horrible at making decisions. As the famous, Reba, once said...

"Stop making decisions! You are horrible at making your own decisions. From now on, let me make your decisions for you!"

This is coming from the chick who sends me weekly emails asking what color shoes she should purchase for work. No one is going to be looking at your shoes in the hospital. I promise.

Friday, February 29, 2008

Pilates

So I went to a new Pilates class today and it's one of those classes where everyone is like super fit and there are only like 5 people in the class. I definitely stood out in my tight black pants surrounded my mirrors showing off all my ASSets. And the instructor stares at me the entire time. And she kept saying, "we've never done this move before, but let's try it..." and every move was for your hips and thighs. So she stared at my hips in the mirror during every move and then "ok, guys, keep going.....now another move we've never done before...." And sure enough, all we do are moves that work your hips and thighs. Nothing else. I know what she was doing. I'm very aware of the size of my hips, but thank you for noticing and making me work it out.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Inschool suspension = my room (Room 124)

So now I'm the official in school suspension room. Gotta love it. Today I had Booker T. in my room all day. We'll call him Booker T. And we can pretend that's not his name. But it is. I really like this kid. He's in my 4th grade tutorial group. I might be the only teacher in the school who actually likes him. Because he's bad. And lazy. And has a bad attitude. So naturally, I like him. He got caught stealing something from the principal. I'm not sure what he stole but it was on camera. I'm really not sure what I'm supposed to do with the inschool suspension kids, as I have not been trained on this. But I made him do some work and I made him cry. Mission accomlished. I think...?

I wonder who I'll have tomorrow......

By the way, the funniest kid alive, Marquis, sneaks out of his classroom(which is upstairs) every day around 11:30 to come ask me if I'll give him some Crystal Light......?? Everyday. Except, yesterday, he asked me to go get him Chickfila. ??? Everyday, I say the same thing. NO! Get out of here!

When his class walks by my room in the afternoon, I always hear his teacher say "no! marquis, ms. mcgoldrick does NOT want to talk to you. I promise. get back in line!"

I love my job.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Raised By Wolves

Raised By Wolves is a first grader who was sent to my room on Monday. When you first meet this child, you think she is very cute and sweet. That will last about 35 seconds and then she'll do some bizarre thing. She was in my room about 2 minutes sitting on the carpet with my class as we are sharing our journal writing. I explain to her that I expect her to be a big girl and sit on the floor and just watch everyone else and do what they are doing. After about 15 minutes, for no apparent reason, she gets up , walks over to the gerbil's cage, opens it, and proceeds to stick her arm in to grab the gerbil. Whaaaaat?? No! Stop! What are u thinking?? As we do work, I give her a coloring book so she can do her work. Randomly, she would scream or throw her hands on the desk to make a loud noise. My kids just stare and mutter 'freeeak.' under their breath. After about an hour of her, I was certain that she must be possessed. But then when we watched a video about context clues, she cuddles up in my lap showing signs of being human. Doesn't last long. At one point, she ran out of the room and down to the first grade hallway to get her lunch card. (not lunch time at all) I bring her back into my room and she starts stamping her arm with my stamps before I could grab her. I'm really glad I wore jeans and tshirt that day because all I did was chase this animal. All day I just kept thinking, "did that just happen?" My kids were really great about it. I had the girls show her how to stand in line, how to wash her hands, how to tuck in her shirt, how to tie her shoes, etc. I have always seen Raised By Wolves in the hallway, but to have her in the classroom was much more exciting. It was like a Choose your own Adventure for her. All day.

"Refocus"

So our school has this policy about "Refocus". It's basically a glorified 'timeout'. But it sounds more professional to say "you need to rethink your behavior in the refocus area" instead of "get in time-out". But if a kid is really bad then they get sent out of the room and placed in my room....don't ask. So our assistant principal comes in my room and puts a kid in my Refocus desk and says, "watch him until 2:15 and he can go back to class." Nice. So this kid throws all my papers everywhere and pouts. So I look at his paper and it has "jale" written on it. So of course, I'm like, "you're name is Jale?? Really ? like Jail? Like where bad people go."
"No that's not my name. "
"Ok, so Jale, what was your behavior?" (this is question #1 on the paper)
"stole someone's money"
"What??? really???"
GASP!!! (from my students)
"Well, what did you want?" (question #2)
"money"
"good answer. write that down."
#3 What will you do next time?
"I'll listen to my teacher."
"How would that help? I mean, really. You're a thief. You have a problem with stealing, not listening."
"oh.....can I go back to class."
"i haven't decided."
question #4 Are you ready to go back to class? check yes or no.
Jale was really excited about this question. "I'm ready. See, I put a check."
"No, that's an X, but you can't steal anymore. Got it? And we'll go talk to your teacher to see what she says. She might say no. I would say no if you were in my class."
"Ok, i'll be good. I won't steal no more. I promise."

So....does refocus work? Absolutely not. However, it makes my day so much more interesting when they send them to me. I'll write more about the girl I had yesterday that we refer to as "Raised By Wolves."

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Google saves lives

Whenever I don't know an answer to something, I google it. My kids have started to answers questions with "why don't we just google it?" I love it!

For example, last week the kids asked what A.M and P.M meant in Latin. I knew it was latin but didn't know what. Now I know.

Today I couldn't figure out what building was on the back of the nickel. Now I know, but I'm not telling you'll have to google it yourself.

Happy President's Day

coworker: "Well, we work in HISD so we'll Cinco de Mayo off work before we get President's Day...."

What a great idea! It's a much better holiday anyways.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Quote of the week

me: "Do you ever get in trouble at home?"

one of my favorite students: "Sometimes I bad."

Me: "When could you possibly ever be bad?"

perfect student (after thinking for several minutes): "Sometime I forget to pick up toys."

If you are Japanese and you are reading this, I beg you to reproduce as much as possible. You make the most perfect kids in the world! And if you have extras that you don't need, I'll take one. :)

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Did Valentine's Day come early?


Why did I just get an email from an old love interest who writes that he's getting married in 2 weeks? Why?! Haven't seen or heard from him in 3 years and he picks now to tell me. Thank you for reminding me of how single I am.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Espanol


Yo necisito habar espanol para Spring Break. Help, por favor. Mi espanol es no beuno.
Skittles is going to die. Again. I'm just going to put this prediction out there. Yesterday I put her in her little ball and as I was doing closing it and locking it shut I smashed her tail in it. So part of her tail is now missing. I wanted to vom. So disgusting. I really don't think that I was not meant to have my own pets. Or my own children.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

what a girl wants

me: I just want a guy who isn't going to always argue with me. And he will love me unconditionally regardless of what I say or do. And he will let me say whatever I want. And not tell me to stop complaining.

Reba: No, what you need is a guy who is going to put you in your place. Everyday.
So Skittles (the class gerbil) went home with a certain someone this past weekend and she came back not looking quite like herself. More like a different gerbil. Different size, color, etc. When I send her home with a student, she has all of her toys, food and also a journal. The kids are supposed to write from her perspective to tell about her weekend. Suspiciously, I check out her journal which reads:

"I'm having a great time this weekend with _____. He even took me to the park. He keeps opening my cage. His mom really doesn't like me. But I'm having a very very very good time."



the park??!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Me gusta Taco Bell.

I can come to the conclusion that there are two types of people in this world. There are those who love Taco Bell and there are those who won't admit that they love Taco Bell. Taco Bell is one of the greatest gifts that God has sent us. I love that I can order 6 things and it's about 2 bucks. The best is when you have ordered 6 things and only 1 drink (so it's quite obvious that this is for 1 person) they ask, "is that all?" IS THAT ALL!! I love it! Someone who understands my compulsive overeating!!


So I want to know....which type of person are you?


Monday, January 21, 2008

Quick Update

I posted a couple things today because I know you have all fallen into depression for my lack of blogging. Here's what's new:
-started Beth Moore bible study. I'm really going to try to go to hear her every week and finish this one.
-have decided that 2008 is not as bad as I thought it was going to be
-quit Taco Bell. That lasted about 12 hours before I gave in to my cravings
-volunteer with an after school club called "Young Astronauts"
-after school Reading Club called "Name That Book"
- tutor after school on Mondays for 5th grade
- tutor after school on Thursdays for 4th grade
- got a class pet
- Stanford testing ----is over! YAY!
- www.shamrockmarathon.com Who is with me??

What was I thinking?


Our class now has a class pet. A gerbil. It's a love/hate relationship for me. Sometimes I think that she is really cute, but most of the time I think she is the most disgusting, obnoxious, smelly, repulsive creature in the universe. Her favorite thing to do is to run in the wheel in her cage at excessive speeds. Normally, she adheres to her natural nocturnal tendencies. But some days she is up all day. Running in her wheel. She also likes to transport all of her food into the wheel so that she can eat, run a lap, eat, run a lap and so on. She could be somewhat of a genius or she might just have exercise bulimia. Nevertheless, she has gained some weight recently most likely due to her compulsive eating during workouts.

YMCA

So I workout at the Y and I found a few newly posted signs in the ladies locker room very amusing.

"Do not use shaving cream in the whirlpool.
Do not use hair dye in the locker room.
Thank you for following these rules."

There were about 5 of these signs posted all over the locker room on the mirrors. And you know that this was written because obviously someone broke these rules. You would think this would fall under 'common sense', but I guess it needs to be stated. But here's what I want to know....
When did shaving your legs in the whirlpool become an option for you? Were you in the hot tub and looking down at your hairy legs and thought, "gosh, if only I had my razor...because NOW would be a great time to shave my legs." And hair dye? What was the thought process for that one? Gosh, I wish I had time to dye my hair. Oh, I know. I'll just do that at the GYM.

Monday, January 07, 2008

2007: a year to remember

so apparently, we are supposed to reflect on the year before. Ok, well. Here was my 2007:

January - ran my first marathon

March- snowboarding in Canada

April- va beach

May- playing in St. John and BVI

June- trip to grandma's farm

July- mission trip to Philippines

Aug- Va Beach

Sept- austin

Nov- trip to Ireland

Dec- Va Beach

other: made new friends, ended some friendships, learned how to surf(kinda), gained 10 pounds, lost 10 pounds, moved to a new apartment, moved to a new school, taught a new grade level, new sunday school class, learned to play the guitar---wait no, got a new guitar but haven't learned to play it yet. Overall, it was a pretty good year.
new revelations:

1. i'm an idiot.
2. i hate people.
3. i'm not a fan of 2008.

discuss.

Friday, December 28, 2007

Christmas 2007

I wonder what's inside!? This pretty much sums up the ridiculousness of my family. We stopped pretending that we are normal a long time ago.

Ooops...


I was supposed to take a teaspoon of cough syrup not a tablespoon. I didn't think cough syrup was supposed to be that much fun.
Goals for tomorrow:
1. Get out of bed.
2. Get to the airport.
3. Make it to Houston. alive.
4. Find car.
5. Drive home.
6. Get back in bed.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

"You're medically boring."

Thank you, Dr. Waddell. This was his conclusion after reading my medical history chart. Then he checked me over and concluded that I have a sinus infection, the flu, and bronchitis. But let's start this story from the beginning.

A clue that I may not be feeling well is when I can't eat all that I ordered from Taco Bell. When there are leftovers around me, you know something is wrong. So on Sunday I wasn't feeling well. We (my family and I) were supposed to leave for Texas on Christmas day. But on that day I can't get out of bed, I have a temperature over 102 and can barely breathe. So my mom sets a massive bottle of Tylenol on my dresser and tells me to catch the next flight to Texas. They leave. Tylenol only made the fever go away. After 2 days of feeling like a bus hit me. twice. I decide to make a doctor's appointment. Random selection of doctor. After many phone calls (no one wants new patients) I find a doctor and have to get directions which goes like this:

"Are you coming from the Boulevard or the Shore?"
"What's the Boulevard?"
"Umm...Virginia Beach Boulevard"
"Oh, I dunno. I'm in a house...in a neighborhood.... Cypress Point. I think.... There's a golf course. Ummm"
"What's the name of your street?"
"Uh....good question...let me go check the mail. Actually I'll just mapquest this."
"Good idea."

So I get in a car that I've never driven to a part of town I've never been as I'm coughing up a lung and it's pouring down rain and 30 degrees. Dr. Wadell was cool. He walks in and we start talking and I realize that he's Australian. So I wanted to say something, but what would I say? "So...you're Australian." That'd be like him saying..."so you're sick." Maybe I could ask what part of Australia he's from. But I don't know anything about Australia. Keep your mouth shut, Melissa. I had to keep telling myself this over and over. We chatted for over an hour, partly because he had a good sense of humor, but mostly because I was his only patient the day after Christmas. All of a sudden, I realize that he's not Australian. Not even a little bit. He checks me out and determines that I am need of several medications:

1. Z Pack. BOR-ING. Ok, Dr. Wad-DULL, don't be so obvious.
2. some kind of nasal spray from outer space. This stuff is ridiculous. It's like snorting Vaporub. He told me that people get addicted to it and gave me a lecture for about 15 minutes. I really don't want to go to rehab for nasal spray. How embarrassing.
3. Cough syrup. No no no. I don't do cough syrup, Dr. Waddell. When he assures me that this cough syrup is laced with Vicodin, then I knew he was the greatest doctor on the planet.

After setting off the car alarm at Walgreens(while I'm in the car) I told the pharmacist that I would wait for my prescriptions so I don't have to come back here and get lost again. I spent over $100 on prescriptions, soup, and vitamin water.

So I get home to play with the medication. The cough syrup looks like what I kept coughing up. NASTY! But I pour it in a shot glass to psych myself up and chant VICODIN! VICODIN! and chase it with Vitamin water. WOOOHOOO!!! I was ready to PAR-TAY!

Needless to say, I'm feeling alot better today. Not totally well, but much better.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Are we still in high school??

I just have to ask. Due to all the latest drama I need to know....are we adults living in adult world? or is this high school part 2?

by the way, my mom sent me a text a few days ago that said:

"ideas for christmas gifts. HSM2?"

YES!!! I love it. I love HSM and even more HSM2, but I don't want to be in high school again. ever.

Sunday, December 09, 2007

Killarney












Ummm...not sure what to say about this town. It was cute. Maybe my favorite town. Not alot going on, but very quiet and quaint. We took a bus tour of the Ring of Kerry, walked around the town a little, and hung out at the cutest hostel ever made called the Sugan.


Inside the Sugan.


On the side of the road. Stuff like this is everwhere in Ireland. Random remains of castles.

We had lunch here.

Blarney....not baloney

What they don't tell you about the Blarney Stone is that in order to get to it you have to put your life in danger and climb a 30000 year old castle that is falling apart. It was pretty scary at some points. Being the clumsiest person alive, I'm very thankful that I didn't fall. And yes, people have fallen and died. But it's all worth it to kiss the stone and receive the gift of eloquence. Which I obviously didn't need to do.
I'm glad I didn't fall.
Yeah, try walking on that.

All for this stone. It looks like I'm crying, but I'm really laughing. I think. Maybe I was crying.


View from the top.




Wednesday, December 05, 2007

You think you know...but you have no idea.

Let's just say that we had a little plumbing issue early this morning. New carpet will be in order for tomorrow for just about 1/2 of the apartment. As I was standing in 3 inches of water this morning, I was wondering what is God trying to teach me? (Actually, let's be honest. I was thinking 'what is God doing to me?') So I did what I always do in a stressful situation. Called my school for a sub. Went to CVS and overloaded on peanut hershey kisses and diet dr. pepper. Life is a little better now.

Sunday, December 02, 2007

The craic was mighty!!

That means that I had a good time in Ireland. Craic= good times, fun. So you could ask "where's the good craic?" and they would tell you. And yes it's pronounced like "crack". I was only there for 7 days but I saw most of the country. There's alot to tell so I'm going to try to go in sequential order.

Arrived in Dublin. Took the bus to Cork. Hid my camera and tried to act like I wasn't a tourist. Sorry no pictures to display at this point. However, I did encounter a little culture shock. At the airport I was walking through baggage claim and there was an Irish lady pushing a cart and shouting "RUDE!" and pointed at each person she was passing. I tried desperately to get out of her way, but of course I jumped right in her path of craziness and she pointed and shouted "RUDE!" at me. I'm thinking, wow, are all the Irish like this? Luckily, I got out of Crazy Town and several nice people helped me find my way to the bus station and even one lady let me use her phone when I couldn't figure out how to use my phone card to call my sister.

So I get on the bus and it's pretty nice. We stopped along the way for a restroom/food break at a place that would be equivalent to a gas station but no gas. As I am leaving the restroom, I run into another Irish lady. She stops me and says, "teeelets." ummm, okay. So I smile and say hi. And she looks very confused and says, "do you know where?" Umm. "Excuse me?" "Teeelets?" "I'm not sure." She looks very angry at this point. "Teelets??!!" "I'm sorry, I really don't know what you are asking. Are you asking for the restroom? Toilets?" "NO! TEELETS!!" Oh, my gosh. I'm obviously not from here. Doesn't my obnoxious American accent tell you anything? However, this doesn't seem to deter her from getting louder. "Well, if you are looking for the toilets, it's right there." I point to the massive sign that says "Toilets". She says, "are you sure?" "YES. Very sure." So toilets is what you say instead of restroom. But it's pronounced Teelets. We definitely speak the same language. This is going to be harder than I thought.


Imagine all the stereotypes you have about the Irish and what Ireland is like and that is what it is. The men look like rugby players, they curse ALOT, they say inappropriate things ALOT, there are A LOT of pubs, everyone looks the same, Feck is their favorite word (yes, that is how they pronounce it), there are lots of red heads, old men walk with canes and little Jack Russell dogs, all beer comes in a pint, it's rainy and/or cloudy most of the time, there are random old castles on the side of the road everywhere, potatoes are served with every meal.






This is Katie. She is the youngest of the kids and she is obsessed with pink. She also came into my room and told me that it was messy and proceeded to pack my suitcase for me. Her favorite game is "what's this". She asked her mom what color I was, hoping that I would be pink. As you can see from the picture, she's a little diva.



Here are some pics of Cork.



To be continued......

Sunday, November 18, 2007


I have a few hopes and dreams for Ireland. These are the things I want to accomplish while there:
1. Capture a leprechaun. Ok, or just see one.
2. Learn new Irish words and phrases. That won't be the hard part. But using them correctly might be.
3. Have someone refer to me as a lassie. hahaha I dunno.
4. Find a pot of gold.
5. Kiss the Blarney stone.
6. Go to a real Irish pub.
7. Go to mass at St. Patrick's church. I've never been to mass before so I'm not sure what to expect.
8. Not get robbed or stabbed.

Friday, November 09, 2007







Dear Hershey Chocolate Company,


Stop making new delicious flavors. You are ruining my life.


Melissa



Wednesday, November 07, 2007

my boring life

So I was thinking about how boring my life is and how I want to move to a new and exciting city. But then I realized that I was at Target buying items to make a karate costume for a pig.

Maybe my life isn't as boring as I think. I'll explain more on Friday about that. There will be pictures too if I can remember to bring my camera.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

What I'm obsessed with...

Most of you know that I get really obsessed with certain things for a short amount of time until something new comes along and needs to be obsessed about. These are my latest obsessions.

1. reading biographies...mostly about missionaries that lived a long time ago like William Carey, Amy Carmicheal and Patrick of Ireland (yeah, took me awhile to figure out that was ST. Patrick. He was really interesting.)

2. the candy corn pumpkins! I dream about these all year long and now it's the only time of year when I can justify eating an entire bag of them. you know it's an obsession when caroline and i break into nicole's classroom just to steal some of these pumpkins from her estimation jar. oops! your class might need to re-estimate that.

3. running. I feel really weird when I skip a day. so I even ran the 1/2 marathon with a fever yesterday. probably why I'm home sick today.

4. Jimmy Eat World's new cd. "Chase this Light" I listen to it about twice a day. I think that justifies an obsession.

5. Looking up international schools and then researching the city and getting obsessed about it. Currently I am obsessed with Cairo. I just go over my obsession with Madrid.

6. My trip to Ireland!! Yes, it's really happening. 20 more days!

Sunday, October 14, 2007

"Keep Austin Weird"


I think the photos pretty much sum up the trip. Good times had by all.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

my burfday

Thanks girls, for celebrating with me!



Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??!!! Best idea EVER!


This might be why I am single.

Thanks Em, for putting this all together. I know those hostess chicks gave you a hard time. Maybe next year I'll just celebrate at Taco Bell and we can bring our own cotton candy on fire.


My heart belongs to.....




The concert last tuesday was amazing. As usual. This was the 3rd or 4th time to see Dashboard and he gets better every time.


Wednesday, October 10, 2007

More Birthday Cards

"You are totally perfect excpet for nine or ten things. Definitely 10. Happy 27th! Send me an Asian!"

--(I'll let you figure out who sent this one. )

Friday, October 05, 2007

birthday card

"Happy Birthday! We love you! Come to see us when you can. I bake chocolate chip cookies."
--grandma and grandpa

I'm glad my grandma reminded me that she bakes chocolate chip cookies. Just in case I forgot.

Friday, September 28, 2007

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Oh whatever.....

So I'm supposed to fill this thing out or whatever. Thanks for picking me, Em. This is all for you.

1. What were you doing 10 years ago? Let's see...starting my junior year of high school. oh joy. Probably doing the same thing I do now....only instead of being in school, I teach it now. My best friends were Jay and Courtney Hunt. Weird.

2. What were you doing 5 years ago? That was my first senior year....loved it!!! I hung out alot with those crazy boy neighbors upstairs. Loved them! Best year of college! Wait, no. 2002 was when I lived with Steph and Caroline and started dating Thom. Not my favorite year. But it was fun. My best friends were Hanna and Greg and Charlie. Hmmm. interesting.

3. What were you doing 1 year ago? Teaching 4th grade at a different school. My teaching partner just quit and I was super stressed about work. I had the worst kids on the planet and ran out the door every day at 3:15.

4. What did you do yesterday? Ran 4 miles at 5AM. Taught 7 year olds about self-control and subtraction. Stayed late at school organizing everything until 7:45pm. I need a life.

5. Snacks I enjoy ... pretty much everything that is edible. That chocolate cake I had yesterday was pretty good. I really like apples too. I dunno.

6. Things I would do with $100 million dollars ... honestly?? I would probably waste it just like I do with all the other money I had. But if I was being responsible....give lots away to good mission organizations like Door of Hope and Compassion International, etc. Pay off Reba's med school debt. And build a bigger orphanage than Oprah did in Africa. Not really, I'd just buy alot of cute shoes.

7. Locations I would run to ... Greece, Antarctica, Australia, Switzerland, South Africa, Peru.

8. Bad habits I have ... not calling people back. sorry! and procrastination in general.

9. Things I like to do: run, read, sleep, laugh. basic stuff. oh, and I LOVE snowboarding and wake boarding. The beach. Traveling. Having really good conversations with really good friends.

10. Biggest joy of the moment: Grace

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

18 more days until my birfday..... yay!

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Painting is my crack

So apparently when I get stressed, I really like to paint. In the last week, I have painted 3 mirrors, 4 flower pots, and a bar stool. Now I'm totally addicted.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Pitching Tents?

This still makes me laugh.

When Good Pandas Go Bad....


Read this.


The best part of the story is at the bottom of the page.


" A month earlier, a drunken Chinese tourist bit a panda at the Beijing Zoo after the animal attacked him when he jumped into the enclosure and tried to hug it."


How did I not hear about this?? That is awesome. Good job, panda.

The Marriage Proposal


Yes, it's the dead of night so therefore I am awake and bored as usual. I once thought that insomniacs were all liars. Now I understand. Jet lag is going to be the death of me.


Marriage proposals are usually rare for me. Especially in foreign countries. Maybe my uncomfortable moment can amuse you. So I will tell the story.


On Tuesday of my trip to the Philippines we had a Pastor's conference. I had just walked over to this when I was approached by this guy. He came over, introduced himself, shook my hand. His name is Moses. Interesting.


Before I go on, I need to explain a little about the Filipino culture. Men and women do not show any signs of public displays of affection. Even if they are married, they do not hold hands or touch in public. It would be equivalent to like making out in public or something. Also, they don't date. Girls will have one boyfriend who they met in high school and that's who they marry after college. No such thing as dating. They think Americans are kinda skanky for dating. Maybe we are.


Ok, so we were having a "rolling brown-out". This happens several times a day when the power goes out for sometimes a few minutes or about 8 hours. So the lights went out, no one even flinched because they are so used to it. And Moses and I are talking. He's telling me about all the instruments he can play. He can play so many different instruments that he can't even think of all of them. Uh, huh. So then the conversation turns down a bumpy road.


Moses: Have you left a husband or boyfriend in the United States?

Me: Oh, no.

Moses: Oh, I thought you were married. It looked like you had a ring on.

Me: Umm. No this ring is on my pinky finger and it's made of plastic. hahaha. (uncomfortable laughing)

Moses: Are you searching for a husband?

Me: What?? Searching?? ummm no

Moses: You don't want to get married?

Me: Maybe someday. I wouldn't use the word 'searching' maybe just 'waiting'?

Moses: Well, maybe, Melissa I could pray for you and you could pray for me.

Me: Um sure.

Moses: I think that you could pray that God might bring us together in marriage.

Me: Umm.

Moses: I am wanting you to be the mother of my children.

Me: No, no thanks.
Moses: I think you should pray about this. And ask God if we should marry.
Me: Nope. I don't think so. Sorry.


(Really uncomfortable silence.)


Me: Well, I need to go find my friends.

Moses: Maybe, we could just be friends and I could get your email or phone number.

Me: No, I'm not going to do that. Sorry. Goodbye.


Now I think I should mention some important things. Moses is not Filipino. He is African. Later I found out that he is an "African prince" and he proposes weekly to every girl he meets. Nice. Everyone else thought this story was hilarious. I just avoided all conversations with guys for the rest of the trip.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Jet Lag


So I'm experiencing major jet lag and I've been up all night. I congregated with all the drunks at Taco Bell around 2am. Since there's not much you can do at 4am, I might as well write more about my trip.
Monday through Friday our group was in charge of the convocations for the high school and college groups. 1 high school convocation in the morning and 2 college convocations each day. Up to 5,000 students attended each convocation at Rose Memorial Hall. Pictured above.


I also spoke to a college class about being single and my relationship with God. This is a picture from one of the windows. Central air is not something of the Philippines. We were lucky to have a fan in most places. Temps were in the 90s most days.

Looking out the back of the auditorium in Rose Hall. There was a prayer group from the different Christian organizations that prayed for us during the convocation. Right before I went on stage to speak to thousands of students, my new Filippino friend, Elaine, told me that her group was there to pray for me. God is amazing.


This is Elaine. She became one of my closest friends there. She is a part of a mission team that goes and does mission work with various tribes that live in the mountains. She also helped me with my Tagalog. Magandang hapon!

"What is a 'ya'll'?"




Magandang gabi!

I'm back in the USA finally. We travelled for 40+ hours each way. I am experiencing major jet lag. I made the mistake of taking a 7 hour "nap" when I arrived yesterday. So I just woke up and had "breakfast". It is 8AM to me even though the clock says 9pm.

Everything was amazing. I don't know where to begin. I'll tell you a little about the Filippinos. Not only are they the friendliest people in the world they are the most gracious and loving people. You are expected to greet every person you pass. I was either called "Ma'am Melissa" (teacher) by the students or "Ate Melissa" (older sister) by the college students. Their culture is all about respect. Filippinos will love you forever, but if you make them mad they will hate you forever. I can respect that.

On Sunday we went out to several different churches to assist in the morning services. I gave my testimony at Sambag Baptist Church. I also had my first 3rd world country experience with the C.R. or restroom. (It is called the C.R which is short for Comfort Room. I found no comfort here.)


Monday through Friday we were at Central Philippine University. The bus came to pick us up at 7am and we would return around 7 or 8 pm every night. During the day we were responsible for the college and high school convocations. We performed the special music, preaching, and testimonies. I spoke to 5,000 students one morning. "The joy of the Lord is my strength."

More to come....I've got to pack to get ready for my flight to VA Beach tomorrow.....

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Philippines Prayer Guide


Thursday July 19th

Pray as each of us leaves Houston we will go in His strength with a song in our hearts, ready to exalt the Father.
Exodus 15:2

Friday, July 20th
Pray that the team will experience unity as we pray in agreement, live in harmony, caring for one another and meeting each other's needs.
Psalm 133:1

Saturday, July 21st
Pray that each team member trust God completely as they share His truth. Pray that each person will embrace this scripture and realize God has chosen them and will help them.
Isaiah 4:9-13

Sunday July 22nd
Pray that all team memeber are encouraged in the Lord trusting Him for wisdom and a clear message.
Psalm 19:7

Monday July 23rd
Pray for safety and good health as each team member trusts in the Lord for His presence in ministry.
Psalm 125:1-16

Tuesday July 24th
Pray for each pastor who attends the seminar that they will be blessed and encouraged.
Colossians 3:2

Wednesday July 25th
Pray that joy will overflow showing forth Jesus.
Colossians 3:16

Thursday July 26th
Pray for each spokesperson to be bold and clear in message.
Ephesians 6:19

Friday July 27th
Pray that we believe God for miracles
Colossians 1:9

Saturday July 28th
Pray that during this time of rest a new awareness of God's mercy and grace will be experienced by all.
Colossians 3:15

Sunday July 29th
Pray thanking God for the presence of His Holy Spirit that gives us freedom.
2 Corinthians 3:17-18

Monday July 30th, Tuesday July 31st
Pray for each team member as they return home that their walk with the Lord has taken a giant step forward.
Colossians 4:2

Monday, July 16, 2007

Cringe


Did you have a high school diary? Would you like to read it aloud?

These people did. And it is hilarious.



I would LOVE to go to Cringe Night and read mine. The thing is that my current diary entries sound like everyone else's high school entries. Just for this occasion I found an old diary from high school. If I could find my middle school diary, I'm sure that would be even better.


1996

"I'm in love! I met this guy in Driver's ed. He's great. He's tall, brown hair, good clothes, plays baseball, and good sense of humor. I'm not sure what color his eyes are, but I'll check tomorrow. He's just perfect. Except I don't know if he's a christian. I hope we can become better friends. He must have a girlfriend because no one who looks like that cannot have one. I can't believe he talks to me, and he knows I'm a freshman!"


Have I changed at all since high school?? It appears that I'm still looking for the same characteristics in a man. HAHA! I've been reading my old diaries and I'm so glad I wrote down all this stuff because I completely forgot about it. Most of what I wrote was prayer. It was more like a "dear God" diary.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Worth a million words

The world's tallest man meeting the world's smallest man. 7'9 vs. 2'5.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

What have I signed up for???


Ok, so maybe you know that I'm going on a mission trip to the Philippines next week. And if you know that, then you know that I have been totally freaking out about speaking to groups of 1,000-plus university students. I've had to totally trust God on this one. So I get a phone call on Sunday from our leader. It went something like this:

Harvey: Hey, Melissa! Just wanted to let you know about some new things about our trip.

Me: Great!

Harvey: We have set up some time with a local TV station to give a 30 minute devotional in the mornings. Some men have been asked to do this.

Me: Great!

Harvey: And we also set up a time with a reporter to interview someone to speak about American education.

Me: Great!

Harvey: And so you will be doing that. Your going to talk about what education is like in America and answer questions.

Me:...................

Harvey: And you could also add something about Christian education too.

Me:.................

Harvey: Well, it's been great talking to you and I'll see you at the next meeting.

Me: ...........mhpbye.


WHAAAAAAAAATTT??? Total freak out session. What do I know about education?? I can't be on TV?? This is all wrong. What have I signed up to do?? Don't these people know this is not my thing? I can't talk to large groups of people and I can't be on TV!

I compose myself long enough to drive to Barnes and Noble and look for books about anything related to education and Christianity. I found a book called "Learn the Bible in 24 hours". I was tempted to get it, but I was afraid someone might see me "cramming" for the mission trip and rat me out. It was just about as thick as the bible. Why not just read the bible? I ended up spending about 3 hours there and came out with a book that had nothing to do what I was looking for. "Let me be a Woman" by Elizabeth Elliot. It looks good and I can't wait to start reading it.

Anyways, after I calm myself I realize what God is teaching me. Lesson#1 "It's not about you, Melissa." Lesson #2 "Get over yourself." I feel like he has been teaching me this for the past 26 years. I need to let God take over this and rely fully on His strength because I have no strength of my own. On a side note, I have been working with the Houston Project (our church's local mission trip) on the evangelism team. I thought this would help me get over myself. I am completely out of my comfort zone and totally relying on the Lord for help. I'm just just as freaked out about the Philippines trip, though.
"When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul."
Psalm 94:19

Saturday, July 07, 2007

100 Things

1. My initials are MMM. When someone discovers this, they are always way more excited about it than I have ever been.
2. I screen my phone calls. Alot.
3. I might have a disease called Celiac. Go look it up and learn something.
4. I google my own name more than anyone else's name.
5. I've gotten prank calls from my students before.
6. The prank calls make me laugh.
7. Most of the time whenever a student does something really bad and I get mad at them at school, I usually laugh about it at home. I think bad kids are the most amusing and my favorites.
8. I do have favorite students. Sorry, but I do. My first year of teaching, I tried really hard not to have favorites. But it happens. I like all the bad ones so it kinda balances out.
9. I was always called the Teacher's Pet when I was in school and I absolutely hated it. I never did anything wrong. I was never in trouble at school. Except one time.
10. In first grade, when everyone went outside to P.E I hid in the bathroom. I watched my classmates all doing jumping jacks and I ate all the teacher's candy. It started out with just one piece. Then 2. Then just one more...next thing you know, the jar was empty. Unfortunately, the teacher caught me and asked me if I ate any of her Red Hots. I said no. She made me open my mouth and I was totally busted. But I never admitted that I ate them. I had nerves of steel.
11. I am a compulsive eater.
12. I wanted to be in the FBI when I was younger. I would be a really good spy.
13. One of my favorite toys growing up was this "Scientist Kit". It had all these magnifying glasses and a microscope with slides of bacteria and bugs and stuff. It was amazing. And totally real. I wanted to be a scientist also.
14. My senior year of high school I decided that I wanted to be a physical therapist. I quit the Varsity softball team so that I would have time to volunteer at a physical therapy center.
15. My first major in college was for Physical Therapy.
16. Actually, my first major was Biology. Reba, stop laughing.
17.Then I changed to Pre-Physical Therapy.
18. I took Biology 113 (Intro Bio) three times. I made a D twice. I needed a C. Third try I made a B.
19. I pass out at the sight of blood. Hence, my major then changed to Sports Management.
20. I am possibly hypoglycemic. I have not been officially tested for this, but I passed out a couple times and each time the last words I uttered were "I'm really hungry, guys...." I get really shaky when my blood sugar level drops.
21. Nothing about Biology makes sense to me. I am not really sure I even believe in "cells".
22. My first job was working at a daycare in Brentwood.
23. When I was working at the preschool at Grace Bible church in college, I had 2 kids who were autistic. That is probably one of the most fascinating disorders. I could have watched those kids for hours. They were not high-functioning so they did not talk or communicate with people at all. I always tried to figure out what they were thinking about. I still get excited when I meet a person with Autism.
24. In high school, I once met a girl who claimed to be a witch. I really believe she might have been possessed. It was a very strange encounter.
25. I have been on 5 mission trips. Utah, Mexico, New Orleans (twice), and Chile. I'm going to the Philippines later this July.
26. I used to babysit. Alot. I would fall asleep when I was babysitting. Alot. But I was always asked to return even though the parents would have to wake me up while the kids are running around on some sugar-induced high. A trustworthy babysitter is hard to find.
27. I really don't like being around babies.
28. There is a nasty rumor that I don't like babies. It's not true. I don't like being around babies. There is a difference.
29. I LOVE African babies. I want one.
30. I have had 10 different roommates.
Jennie, Courtney, Kim, Lori, Stephanie, Caroline, ??(What is that girl's name??.....she was never home and she was only there for a couple of months....), Hanna, Natalie, Jennie again, Ashley (current roommate)
31. I have never lived in the same city for more than 5 consecutive years.
32. I have moved every single year since I was 18.
33. I am an expert at packing/moving.
34. I have lived in Houston for the past 3 1/2 years.
35. I only keep in contact with 1 person from High School.
36. I hated High School.
37. I LOVED my middle school.
38. My favorite animal is the panda. It has been my favorite animal since middle school.
39. I received stuffed pandas and other panda paraphernalia for gifts. This continued for several years. All of that is in my classroom. My students love my giant stuffed pandas and they count all the pandas in the room when they are bored.
40. One time I turned around and one of my psycho students was punching one of the giant stuffed pandas in the face. I couldn't scream. I couldn't move. I got him off of the panda, but the panda had a broken arm and was losing stuffing very quickly. Luckily, I had a Room Mom who took the panda home and stitched him up. The panda came back to school the next day with a sling on his arm. Everyone was so happy. That boy transferred out of my school shortly after that.
41. I just remembered how weird that boy was. He and his twin sister were 'professional' ice skaters. They would tour the country as a skating act. He obviously had some anger issues. He also had an abnormally shaped head.
42. There are some students I will never forget. And there are some who I will never remember their names. I never remember the good kids.
43. I have been to 6 different countries.
44. I want to go to at least 4 more before I'm 30.
45. I really don't want to ever be 30.
46. My second year teaching I had a student with Cerebral Palsy. She went to physical therapy 4 times a week and had several surgeries just so she could walk using a 'walker'. We had an aide who would take her to the bathroom, but sometimes I had to help her. This totally changed my outlook on life. Every time I ran after meeting her I praised God for my ability to run. She would give anything to run and I complain about how fat my legs are. At any moment my ability to run could be taken away. I want to treasure every opportunity I have to use my legs. This inspired me to run the marathon last year. I was so grateful for every step of that race.
47. I want to run my second marathon in 2008.
48. 100 things is too much.
49. I once had a crush on this guy with a prosthetic leg in my class. I was only attracted to him because of his leg. It was metal, not the plastic kind. I couldn't stop staring every time he moved. I never missed that Management class.
50. When I ran the 1/2 marathon last year, a guy with a metal leg passed me. It wasn't the same guy.
51. I love to read.
52. One of my favorite things as a kid was to curl up with a book in bed and read all night long.
53. I still do that sometimes.
54. I'm really jealous of people with a fast metabolism. Especially Frizzy Stick.
55. In High School, my dad told me that he thought God had told him that I was going to be a missionary. I told him he was wrong and that he should listen more closely to God. What I was really thinking was: Maybe I need to listen more closely to God.
56. My dad used to read Edgar Allen Poe stories to me when I was a kid. I love those stories and poems.
57. I hate scary movies.
58. I am incredibly shy. I am so shy that sometimes I think maybe I just have a social disorder. My face gets really red and I sweat profusely when I think people are staring at me. I am that shy.
59. In college, I thought that if I took an acting class I could rid myself of this shyness. However, the class I signed up for made us run around like wild animals and make crazy movements on the floor. It didn't help that the most perfect man in the world was in that class. Shyness was not completely overcome. But I do feel more comfortable making a complete fool out of myself in public.
60. Alcohol helps with the shyness.
61. That is why I started drinking in college.
62. My first alcoholic drink was a shot of vodka.
63. Sometimes I would rather talk to strangers than answer a phone call from a friend.
64. I like meeting new people.
65. I have had a crush on the same guy for the last 5 years. Yes, the guy from the acting class.
66. I have only said about 4 words to him. Ever. And those words were probably "do you remember me?"
67. I tend to not talk to guys that I really like. Shyness.
68. One time I had to call the cops on my neighbors. The man was beating the crap out of the woman. It was probably one of the scariest moments in my life. I could hear her head hitting the wall.
69. I want to get married.
70. But then sometimes I don't.
71. I love breakfast. Best meal of the day. I NEVER miss it.
72. Actually, I don't miss any meal. In fact, sometimes I have extra meals.
73. I just called my grandma. I LOVE that woman.
74. I really want to learn how to play the guitar.
75. I really wish I could sing better than I do.
76. Musicians are hot.
77. South African accents are hot.
78. British accents are hot too.
79. When I was 10 I broke my finger. My dad didn't believe that it was broken so he reset it. I screamed. The doctor said good news and bad news. Bad news: your finger is broken and you need a cast. Good news: I don't have to set it. I wore a cast for a long time. Then once it was off, I had to keep it taped. We played Red Rover at recess. It grew back crooked. I still catch people staring at my finger when I write. It is difficult to write for a long period of time.
80. I hate when people stare at my finger.
81. I have a big fear of snakes.
82. My grandma shot a rattlesnake with her shotgun a couple months ago. She loves to tell that story.
83. It is very strange to be in the Singles Department at church. When I was little, my dad was the Singles Minister so I remember "the singles". It is also weird that our Singles Minister kinda looks like my dad.
84. I love my roommate, Ashley. She is the best roommate I have ever had. I haven't seen her in over a week. That's how opposite our schedules are.
85. I have had 6 cars.
86. I have hit many parked cars. Actually, I think all I have ever hit are parked cars.
87. I have never had a speeding ticket. Only tickets for running red lights.
88. I have argued my way out of 3 tickets.
89. I have cried during the other 3 tickets.
90. I feel very lucky to have grown up knowing the Lord.
91. When I was little, I would say that Jesus was my best friend. Adults thought that was cute. But I was very serious about it. I would always leave a place for Jesus. At night I would tuck him in. He was like my imaginary friend only cooler because he was God.
92. I really don't like to hear birds in the morning.
93. I am a morning person. I like to run first thing in the morning.
94. I smell books before I read them.
95. I love the library. And bookstores.
96. I love my sisters. I wish we saw each other more than once a year. I miss them all the time.
97. I like clothes. Apparently, I like clothes a little too much according to my credit card bills. I am trying not to buy any new clothes for a month. Not sure how that is going to work out.
98. I have very low self esteem. I struggle with this daily.
99. I would like to one day write a book.
100. It feels like I just wrote a book.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Mad Parking Skills


For those of you who are aware of my incredible parking skills, this won't be shocking to you. Parking is obviously not my spiritual gift. My first week at my new apartment and I already have a nasty note from the management.
"Please park your vehicle closer to the curb as not to impede traffic flow. Your cooperation in this manner.
Your management team,
Memorial Creole"

It was typed, but they must have written it pretty quickly. Here's what I wrote back. (But I decided not to deliver.)

"Dear Memorial Creole,
Actually, that was some of my better parking. You should be lucky that I didn't hit any parked cars. Especially your car. Writing notes will not improve my parking skills. No need for any more notes.
Your favorite resident,
Me"